Do you think this story is good? what grade do you think i am in based on this?

Since you are writting from a teenager's perspective, i would think either 10th or 11th. The things that normally fill a tragic teenagers like would be : death, despair, evil and good. You have those elements, which makes me think that you've gone through a good part of your english education. This is excellent and if i was a teacher( sixteen year old girl) I would deffinitly give it high marks and ask you to finnish it so that I could give it to someone. It is really good! you can email me for extra comments: www.michie93@gmail.com